Its Just Depressing

I haven't been writing here I think because the subject really depresses me. I want to have another child so bad and it just can't happen now. I am really struggling with previous pregnancies that were terminated or lost. Especially the last one 8 months ago.

I am very frustrated that I didn't get the help I deserved. Every time I see a pregnant woman it is all I can do to hold back the tears. My daughter is about to turn 10 and I just keep thinking that I want to do this soon. I am only 30, but I feel like time is just flying by. I guess that would be that biological clock ticking away.

I hate that I get so sick when I get pregnant. I can't stand hearing how most women bearly get sick and pop kids out left and right.

I really want to try again, but I just can't now. So my days are filled with things that keep my mind else where so I don't burst in to tears every moment of the day.